Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. “Pooh!” he whispered.
“Nothing,” said Piglet, taking Pooh’s paw. “I just wanted to be sure of you.”
Have you ever shared a friendship with anyone so special that it was too amazing to be real? Piglet has. I have too. And such should be a bond within friends. In recent times, the meaning of friend has become too commercial. I would like to put blame on Facebook. It calls everyone your friend. Whether you add your boss, your colleague or father, they all get listed under the “friends” category. But are they really your friends? Do you share a bond with mutual affection? With your father, you most certainly do, but your boss and colleague?? Nah!!
In the old times during the war, soldiers and politicians often used this phrase, “Who goes there, a friend or a foe?” When I heard this phrase, I understood it’s cruciality. The term friend in those times held a lot of importance. Lives depended on it because a friend, then, meant someone who would fight alongside and not betray nor cut a wound open for the enemy to rub. Someone who is trustworthy and caring. Someone who can be confided in not just personal but about legal and political matters too. Someone who would die fighting the enemy for you. I for one still value, know and have such friendships in my life. Because if you consider a person your friend and don’t trust him as you trust yourself then you do not really understand the true meaning of friendship.
Judge a person before becoming his/her friend. I know, we should not judge a book by its cover however, know that we are not befriending a book but a live biography. Judging after a friendship is formed only creates rifts between the two. And this rift cannot be mended. When you choose to admit someone as your friend, you are indirectly accepting the person as they are and making an opinion after the bond’s formed isn’t good icing! I would say give it a chance. Even if you haven’t thought through before making friends and reach a point of passing any judgement, clear the air first. Be outspoken. If you don’t like something speak it out. People do change and such change is good for friendships That is what judgement means per dictionary.com; form an opinion wisely, discreetly.
Moreover, it is also important that you do not regard only yourself and are not entering a friendship for this very reason. The second-best relationship is that which you have with your friends. Both you and the friend are equally important members of this relation. Cherishing friends is vital, otherwise the friendship is null in all its beauty. As Seneca says, “One who seeks friendship for favorable occasions, strips it of all its nobility.” What is the point in being friends if you can’t help each other in your times of need. Those times when your parents, teachers, colleagues even life partner fails but a true friend prevails.
C.S. Lewis says “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art, like the universe itself… it has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” This is the absolute truth in my case. I take immense delight in all my friendships. Because when I thought that I couldn’t have any friends in life, I met the most beautiful people. People who opened my narrow mind, people who helped me become the person I am. People who made me believe in myself because they did! It is because of them I know what friendship means. And I regard them a lot more than I regard myself. So much that I am ready for a bullet aimed at them.
If you liked this article, do check out an article from Brain Pickings that inspired me to write this article.